What is nesting?

There is a new term used in divorce called “nesting” or “bird nesting.” The label applies to parents who allow their children to remain in the existing family home while the parents alternate between living in the family home and a separate location.

Unfortunately, in most divorces, both parents are not entirely willing to put the needs of their children before their own. Ideally, the idea of nesting would minimize the trauma to children involved in divorce, and both parents would have the first-hand experience of bouncing between homes the way children usually do.

Because most divorced couples refuse to communicate effectively or show respect with one another, divorced couples that make the nesting process work for even a short period are rare.

Also, nesting gets expensive because it requires three homes instead of two. Often, this aspect is unfeasible for divorcing families.

Divorcing couples should always attempt to communicate and show respect for the ex-spouse for the sake of the children. This is only possible when divorcing parents avoid selfishness and immaturity. The few cases of nesting that work are between two ex-spouses who can get along despite no longer being married.

When the dating aspect comes into play, the situation can become complicated.  Many single men and women are unwilling to get involved with divorcees so intimately involved with their ex-spouse.

Although all of the above factors may steer couples away from the idea of nesting, some couples that have used the method successfully and continued to do so until all of their children were off to college. These are the kind of couples with unselfish and loving attitudes for their children.